Council Tenants
Apparently, these are REAL COMPLAINTS coming from British Council tenants to their council. Once again, there's a high probablility of Urban Myth here. - Vikar
- My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus growing in it.
- He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.
- It's the dog's mess that I find hard to swallow.
- I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6 a.m. his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me.
- I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.
- And their 18-year-old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.
- Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.
- My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?
- I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.
- Will you please send someone to mend the garden path? My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.
- I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.
- 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and 50% are plain filthy.
- I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.
- The toilet is blocked and we cannot bathe the children until it is cleared.
- Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour & not fit to drink.
- I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.
- The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.
- Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third so please send someone round to do something about it.
- I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.
- I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them off.
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