Why Dogs Are Better Than Women
- The later you are, the more excited they are to see you.
- Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
- If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.
- Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
- A dog's disposition stays the same all month long.
- Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.
- A dog's parents never visit.
- Dogs do not hate their bodies.
- Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your
point across.
- Dogs like to do their snooping outside rather than in your
wallet or desk.
- Dogs seldom outlive you.
- Dogs can't talk.
- Dogs enjoy petting in public.
- You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24
hours a day.
- Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.
- Dogs like to go hunting.
- Another man will seldom steal your dog.
- If you bring another dog home, your dog will happily play
with both of you.
- A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died
would you get another dog?
- If you pretend to be blind, your dog can stay in your hotel
room for free.
- If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and
give them away.
- A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling
you a pervert.
- A dog won't hold out on you to get a new car.
- If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad,
they just think it's interesting.
- On a car trip, your dog never insists on running the heater.
- Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.
- When your dog gets old, you can have it put to sleep.
- Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.
- Dogs are not allowed in Bloomingdale's or Neiman-Marcus.
- If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.
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