A Farmer in Hell
A farmer from New York dies and goes to hell.
Once there, the Devil notices that this farmer is not suffering
like the rest there are. He checks his gauges and sees that
it's 95 degrees and about 80% humidity. So he goes to the farmer
and asks why he's so happy.
The farmer replies, "I like it here. It's just like plowing
my fields in June."
Unhappy with the farmer's response, the devil goes back to
his controls and turns the temperature up to 105 degrees and
90% humidity. After making the adjustment, the devil goes looking
for the farmer. Finding him just as happy as can be, the Devil
frustratingly asks the farmer again why he's so happy.
"This is even better now! It's like pulling weeds in the
fields during July!" says the farmer.
The Devil, now quite upset and deciding to make the farmer
really suffer, returns to his controls and cranks the heat up
to 115 degrees and the humidity to 100%. "Now we'll see
if that farmer is smiling!" he thinks as he goes looking
for the farmer again.
Finding him sitting on the floor happy as ever, the Devil is
madder than before. When he asks the farmer why he's happy now,
the farmer answers, "This is great, it's just like driving
the combine in August!"
That was enough for the Devil.
Running back to his controls, he turns the temperature down
to a freezing 10 degrees below zero. Within a matter of minutes,
the pools of molten brimstone begin to ice over. "Let's
see what that farmer has to say about this," snickers the
Devil to himself.
To his surprise, the Devil returns to find the farmer running
around and jumping for joy, yelling at the top of his lungs:
"The Rangers won the Stanley Cup! I can't believe it! The
Rangers won the Stanley Cup!"
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