Newlyweds
A newlywed couple had only been married for a few weeks.
The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to get
out on the town and party with his old buddies.
So, he says to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, coochy-coo...?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar pretty face, to have a beer."
The wife says, "You want a beer, my love?" She opens
the door to the refrigerator and shows him 25 different brands
of beers from 12 different countries.
The husband didn't know what to do.
The only thing that he could to say was, "Yes, but at
the bar... you know...they have ...frozen mugs." He didn't
get to finish the sentence.
The wife interrupted him, saying, "You want a frozen glass,
puppy face?" She opened the freezer and handed him a frozen
solid mug.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, tootsie roll,
but at the bar they have those special hors d'oeuvres that are
really delicious...I won't be to long...I'll be right back...I
promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres, poochy poo?" She opened
the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres:
spicy chicken wings, pigs in a blanket, fried mushrooms, pork
strips, cheese dip, the works.
"But sweetie, at the bar...you know...the guys are cussing
and swearing..."
The wife replies, "You want cussing and swearing, cutie
pie? THEN LISTEN UP, DICKHEAD!
DRINK YOUR F@%CKING BEER, IN THIS GODDAMN FROZEN MUG, AND EAT
YOUR F@%CKING SNACKS, BECAUSE YOU AREN'T GOING OUT WITH YOUR
SH%$THEAD FRIENDS ANYMORE!
YOU GOT THAT, A$$HOLE????!!!!!
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