You Know You're a High-tech Worker If...

  • You sat at the same desk for 4 years and worked for three different companies.

  • Your company welcome sign is attached with Velcro.

  • Your resume is on a diskette in your pocket.

  • Your company logo on your badge is applied with stick-um.

  • You learn about your layoff on CNN.

  • Your biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose your best jokes.

  • Your supervisor hasn't the ability to do your job assignment.

  • You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet.

  • Salaries of the members on the Executive Board are higher than all the Third World countries' annual budgets combined.

  • Your home phone has none of the features you developed cuz you're never there.

  • It's dark when you drive to and from work.

  • Fun is when issues are assigned to someone else.

  • Communication is something your group is having problems with.

  • You see a good looking person and know it is a visitor.

  • Free food left over from meetings is your main staple.

  • Weekends are those days your spouse makes you stay home.

  • Being sick is defined as can't walk or you're in the hospital.

  • You work 200 hours for the $100 bonus check and jubilantly say "Oh wow, thanks!"

  • All real work gets started after 5pm or on weekends.

  • Dilbert cartoons hang outside every cube.

  • Plants in your cube are healthier than your plants at home.

  • Your boss' favorite lines are "when you get a few minutes," "in your spare time," "when you're freed up," and "I have an opportunity for you."

  • 10% of the people you work with - no one (boss included) knows what they do.

  • Vacation is something you rollover to next year or a check you get every January.

  • Your relatives and family describe your job as "works with computers" or "does something with telephones"

  • Change is the norm.

  • Nepotism is encouraged.

  • You only have makeup for fluorescent lighting.

  • You read this entire list and understood it.


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